6 TOUCHING IT (and some unmessy activities)

I mentioned before that our bias against drinking urine has a biological basis. But our bias against touching it is purely cultural. There are plenty of cultures in which touching of urine is part of some practical or cosmetic activity. There are peoples, for example, in equatorial Africa who use urine together with clay and ashes to form a paste they apply to their skins that prevents insects from biting. Before certain arctic cultures were exposed to European ways, many used urine for personal washing, especially in the winter when it is too cold to bare your genitals outdoors and when liquid water is precious. Even in the U.S., during the Civil War, Confederate women collected their urine and processed it into potassium nitrate for the war effort. I'm sure that after a few initial wrinkling of noses, this activity became routine to these women, and ceased to disgust them.

The strangest urine use I've heard of was practiced in pre-Christian northern Europe, where elder males consumed a drink made from the mushroom, Amanita muscara. This particular mushroom contains a psychoactive drug which is passed, unaltered, in the urine. More junior members of the group gathered and drank the urine of those who consumed the original drink, and got high also. To anybody thinking trying this themselves, I most strongly caution against it. Besides the questionable wisdom of consuming psychoactive drugs, there is the fact that Amanita muscara is toxic and causes damage to your system. There is also the danger of misidentifying the mushroom. Some species of Amanita will put you in the morgue.

So you still feel a little strange about touching pee?

Next time you're alone in the shower, go ahead and pee, but hold your hand in the stream. Revel in how warm and touchable it really is. Feel the gentle insistence of the stream splashing against your skin. And remember, everything in urine is water-soluble and washes completely away as soon as the shower water flows over it. If the smell bothers you, try having a big drink about an hour before you shower, or shower at the time of day that your urine is normally most dilute (we'll talk extensively about dilution later on).

Now ask your lover to pee in the shower. Your lover will probably agree to this easily, since it is so harmless. Hold your hand in your lover's stream. Revel your lover's warmth. Tell your lover how good it feels. Showering together is fun. Do it often. Touch your lover's wet body and encourage your lover to do the same to you. And do a lot of kissing and cuddling of lingam and yoni. Get used to what they are like when they are wet. Use cool water whenever weather permits so that your lover's spring will feel even warmer by contrast.

When you are comfortable doing those things, try the same exercises but with the shower turned off. As soon as you're done, turn the water on and wash off. As you become less inhibited, try holding your hand right against your or your lovers lingam or yoni as the stream flows. Smear it over the genital area. Direct it down the thighs.

When you and your lover are comfortable touching each other's streams, try lying down in the shower or bath between your lover's legs and let your lover pee on your tummy or on your lingam or yoni. Some folks experience a nearly instantaneous orgasm the first time they feel their lovers' stream on their genitals. If this happens to you, you won't have to ask you lover to change places. He or she will likely volunteer.

Here's another fun exercise. Next time you're at the beach with your lover, stand waist-deep in the water, embrace, and then both of you let flow. The warmth feels good in the cool water, doesn't it? And there is the added excitement of strangers being present but their not knowing what's going on.

Another wonderful situation is the next time you and your lover are caught together outdoors in a rainstorm, either intentionally or otherwise. As long as lightning is not a danger, this is a romantic and titillating situation. You will probably hug and cuddle a lot just for warmth. Since your clothing is likely to be so wet that there is no danger of forming an embarrassing stain in the crotch, feel free to pee in your clothing as the spirit moves you. Try it while you are embracing, or place your lovers hand on your crotch as you do. If privacy permits, try placing your lovers hand inside your clothing as you do. Ask your lover to do the same for you. Although a man usually has a hard time maintaining a stream while his lingam is being erotically stroked, women do not suffer the same syndrome. Ask her to pee while you stroke her yoni the way she likes it during normal lovemaking.

And, in your ordinary home life, take turns watching each other pee. Tend to each other's hygiene, including holding, aiming, and wiping each other's fountainous organs. Be creative in the positions you choose to pee in. Both men and women can still hit the pot in unorthodox positions. If you are in the woods, accompany each other when nature calls. Don't hide it from your lover, make a show of it. Watching a woman pee is an especially strong turn on for many men (a tidbit of knowledge of which prostitutes have always been aware -- they are known to pee publically to catch the eye of potential customers).

Even if you never go beyond the activities in this section, they're still exciting and can be a prelude to passionate sex.